These last 2 days have been tricky.
First, I weighed myself this morning and was pleasantly surprised. My weight stayed flat even though I felt I had eaten half a grocery store the day prior. When I put all my meals into my fitness tracker I was actually within my target calorie range. Guess it helped that I was fairly active on Friday, which balanced my calories a bit. Anyway, breakfast was quinoa pancakes again because DH and I were going to a party later that night. As part of the festivities, we stopped by a great bakery we hadn’t been to in ages and got guava and cream cheese pastries for ourselves. So good. Lunch was 2 grilled chicken tenderloins with a serving of cauliflower “rice.” The rice was interesting. We got the unflavored kind and I seasoned it with a chili coffee seasoning mix. Dinner was a mix of things from the party but I tried to be mindful of portions.
My period started today, which has kept my energy low and I haven’t been very active today. I slept in (which was glorious) so I missed breakfast this morning. I met friends for lunch, which was a lobster roll with a side of fries. I then had a couple of cocktails with the girls. Dinner was a bit of smorgasbord. I had a turkey burger with barbecue sauce on a thin sandwich bun, along with some rice and half a tamale that DH brought home from brunch with his friends. Probably went over my target calories but who cares.
Tomorrow, I have a consultation appointment with a reproductive specialist. DH is going with me. I told my mom about it tonight and she was excited that I haven’t given up on trying to get pregnant, which I guess I implied last time we talked about this. I have mixed feelings because I feel like I’m going to get disappointed again. With the HSG, my odds of pregnancy were supposed to increase by 30%. Going on Clomid, my odds were supposed to increase too, especially at the higher dose. None of that worked. I think I’m mostly ambivalent as a way to protect myself against further disappointment. DH and I already agreed though that the furthest we’ll go is getting the trigger shot and after that we’ll stop trying. This is such a roller coaster.